Renewal

19 Apr

Renewal

Spring is a time for reawakening.
Re-emerging. Renewal. It’s been quite a long time since I’ve had a New England winter followed by spring. In early January I remarked to my father that we might have a beautiful and mild winter. He chuckled and told me, “Don’t count on it. When the snow comes, it won’t stop.” Indeed, that’s what happened a week later. The snowfall began, and for six or seven weeks it seems like it never stopped falling. Several times in the morning I could barely see the cars under them huge drifts of snow. At first, it was delightful to be under the falling snow, shoveling it and cleaning it from the cars.  After three weeks of that, it was a serious drag, and the chores became a monotonous habit.

U Bein’s Bridge during rainy season
During that time, since November, I was taking my father to his chemotherapy and for blood infusions at least two times each week. It seemed that on every Monday morning there was a massive amount of
snow on the road and driving over it was slow and tedious. We made it without incident every time though. Nothing was on my mind during that period except being with my father. My Dad passed on February 25 and just recently, after some warm and sunny days, I began to spring forward.
Cancer is an awful affliction, and though my father had survived it for more than eight years, without too much pain or suffering, he was defiant to the last breath. His mind as sharp as a razor but his body weakened, he miraculously lifted his head and looked around at us standing close to him at the bedside, at home where he wished to be in the end, looked into my eyes for about five very long seconds, fighting the transition – he loved his life and wanted to live on. More important than anything, he never gave up as he passed through this life to another..
Needless to say, I felt profound and immovable sadness. At the same time, I always was, and I’m grateful now still, for being my father’s son.
He was a great man, my best friend, an imperfect human being and that alone made him more adorable. At first, I was lonely and missing him, but now I feel him and his presence in me more than ever since he left. I can say the same for my mother. They are together now. I am happy to think about it this way. The rest of my thoughts are for me to consider and for conversations with my brothers and family. But that’s why I haven’t added to this space until now.
Springing forward now, it’s my first visit to Bamboodazed since my last post. I’m surprised, intrigued and glad that the number of weekly visitors hasn’t lessened very much. Some of you I know, but most I do not. But thank you for visiting and hopefully enjoying the posts and
I hope you’ve learned some things about Myanmar that are untypical and unavailable elsewhere. I’ve held back from posting some things, but I hope to add more photos and videos very soon. I’ll get back into the swing soon, and I’m still working on my first book about my experiences in Burma. So, lot’s to do.
This endeavor, to write about my times in Burma, I consider a real luxury. As I reacquaint myself with my past regarding Burma, and as I consider what’s important to me, I’m sharpening my focus, and in
due time, the book will arrive. I’ve been fortunate to keep in touch with some dear friends from Myanmar, some western expats in Myanmar, and some Burmese expats who are currently living in the United States. They all give me inspiration, and while they don’t know this, that inspiration is a part of my overall genuine gratitude for all aspects of my life regarding Burma. And if I can somehow apply a small fraction of my father’s will to live well towards my writing and also apply
it to my own life, I’ll be very fortunate son.

 

Peace, Love, and Happiness to all.

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